Guest Blog: Friends Don’t Let Friends Pop Their Collar

Our first guest post was submitted by Darren Cogan. For the record I go to church in Georgetown and was wearing a polo and seersucker shorts, of course I had to pop my collar. For more on popping your collar go here.

It has been scientifically proven that collar popping is not only a hazard to one’s health, but to the health of all those around said collar popper as well.  From the beginning of collar popping time, this preppy phenomenon has led to the downfall and demise of some of societies finest, like Freddie Prinze Jr., and it could happen to you or your friends.

Even worse, the Urban Dictionary stated that Collar Popping Syndrome (C.P.S.) is not only “hazardous to personal health but is also a mortal sin.”  Thus, when I saw a friend of mine, a.k.a. Mr. J.S. (I’ll call him “Mr. J.S.” to protect his reputation as a fine outstanding member of the DC community) popping his collar, I skipped the prayer and went straight into action.  As you can see from the photo, C.P.S. led him into a downward spiral of smarmy smiles and uncontrolled, irresponsible book promoting.

Not only did I confront Mr. J.S., I was forced to take a highly aggressive approach in my intervention by hiding his Kyoto coffee mug (which is not really from Kyoto, but from Osaka!) and forcing him to de-pop his collar before handing back his highly coveted mug.  An hour later Mr. J.S. was back to popping and it was then that I realized how futile my effort to save Mr. J.S. had become, like I was on a “Wild Goose Chase.”

In conclusion, collar popping makes babies cry.  If not for yourself or your friend, “stop the pop” for the babies!